stalker

Share

Last night I watched you sleep.

I did it, I watched you sleep. All three of you. It's so cliche!

Lucy, I started panicking over our only having you in our home for a scheduled 11 more years before you face the big bad world alone.

I watched you sleep. I slid my hand under the back of your shirt, feeling your heart beat beneath your ribs.

I often think about how, if I could have taken a sneak-peak ahead to you at 7 years old, 7 years ago, I would have been so relieved.

Phoebe, I actually didn't go into your room, but I stood outside your door and prayed for you. I love you so much. I love that you just got your first tooth and that you're always feeling the edge of it with your tongue. I love that you say, "Dada!" whenever he walks into the room.

I love to breathe in the experience of you, every day. I love your patting of *everything*. Except for bananas. You detest bananas.

Asher, I walked into your room and saw that you were spread out over the top of your comforter. I foisted you up, all 43.5 pounds of you, and snuggled you beneath your comforter.

Then I crawled in beside you. I kissed your earthy-smelling dirty little boy head, and I breathed a prayer of thanks for your life.

For all three of you.